BYU sleep stories

I was reading BYUMagazine and they had a section where you could send in sleep stories. Unfortunately, about par for the course, I was reading it about 6 months too late so it was too late to submit any but I have some good ones.

Anyone who knows me knows that I love to sleep. My roommates used to make fun of me because I could fall asleep anywhere, anytime. And I don't think there was a class in high school or college that I didn't sleep in at least once. And you probably don't want to hear my driving stories, they'd scare you. But here are two of my best school related stories.

First, when I was a junior in high school I had Pre-calculus last period. My teacher was a nice guy and everything but he tended to drone a little. He made me want to go to sleep after about 5 minutes of listening to him. Unfortunately, he seated people alphabetically and for some reason that put me front row on the last row by the door for the whole year. This was unfortunate because that was exactly where his podium was that he stood behind to lecture. I could not have been closer to him if I had tried. Now, being the polite person I am, I tried my darndest to stay awake. He wasn't a bad teacher, just monotone. But in spite of all my efforts, the only thing I remember about that class was sleeping every day all while he talked and waking up just in time to do my homework when he sent us to work.

I know, this isn't all that funny but here's the kicker, I was going through my high school stuff a few weeks ago looking for something and I found a certificate for Student of the Month from that same Pre-Calculus teacher. I laughed for about 10 minutes. I'm not sure what he was using for his selection criteria but it definitely wasn't "# of minutes in class with your eyes open", maybe it was more like, "ability to still get good grades even though you haven't heard a word I've said". Who knows?

Second, about my third year at BYU, I had an upper level French grammar class. Now this was when I was still considering French as a minor and had delusions about my ability with the language. Anyway, it turned out not so good in a number of ways. First of all it was right after lunch, my #1 hardest time to stay awake. Second, it was taught by a native French speaker who talked about a mile a minute. I think I understood about 10% of what he was saying. Third, it was full of returned French-speaking missionaries who also all spoke fluently. Now in my own defense, I could read French really well and knew my grammar 100% better than most of the missionaries but I just didn't have their experience with spoken French.

Anyway, all of these things added up to a whole lot of sleeping in that class. My brain would spend about 5 minutes trying to understand and then shut down and I would fall asleep. So one day I was 90% asleep, sprawled in my desk, and my brain caught a word I knew. The teacher was asking for a translation of a particular word (and had been waiting for a few minutes with no answer) and none of the missionaries knew it because it was something used mostly in written French. I had learned the word the semester before in a French literary class. I perked up, raised my hand and gave the English translation as soon as I was called on. Without missing a beat my French professor purred, "Ahhhhh, I knew it. Madamoiselle White dreams in French."

You can't argue with that

You Are Cheesecake

Rich, sweet, and simply perfect. You're not boring - you're just the best!

What Dessert Are You Most Like?

Too Subtle for Me

Ok, a little background is required to fully appreciate this story. I periodically bug John to put in writing what he likes about me. This is extremely difficult for him. He is very, very, very good at showing me he loves me by doing things for me so I'm not really complaining, I just happen to be a very verbal person and so every once in a while this pops up. This year around our anniversary and my birthday was one of those times. Anyway, so John gave me two books for my birthday. Now I love to receive books for presents, but sometimes when I get them it demotivates me in reading them because, hey, I own them and could read them anytime. (You know in case I was snowed into my house for a week and couldn't get to the library, I would definitely need something to read.) Anyway, so needless to say I didn't read the books. I put them on my bedstand with the other books I intend to read and would look at them every now and then and think, I really ought to read those books. They look like very good books. I think John made a couple of obscure comments about how he was glad that I "eventually" got to the books he bought me. (Which I do by the way, it just takes me a while, especially when I'm not reading that much anyway.)

So fast forward to this morning. I was kind of grumpy this morning. I stayed up way too late last night and was really tired. This combined with a couple of stinky diapers and screaming girls made for one not happy me. I was laying on my bed thinking I needed to be more happy when I saw those books. I thought maybe some uplifting reading would get me in a little better mood. I started reading the first book and got like 15 pages into it and found a little paper that had the date of my birthday on it and one thing John appreciated about me. I thought that's interesting, I don't remember reading that before. So I started flipping through the book and about every 20 pages there was another little paper that said something else he appreciated about me. I couldn't believe it. I looked at the other book and sure enough every few pages there was a little paper. I was shocked. Here was the list I had requested months ago and I didn't even know it. I might not have read those books for a while (years actually) and missed it. At first I had a fleeting thought that maybe these were books that he gave me last year. But when I looked at the date it was this year, phew! It only took me 3 months to get it. My next thought was what a turkey (in a good way) John was. I could have been mad at him that whole time and he would never have said anything even though he had done the requested thing. I wasn't but I thought that was a pretty big gamble. Anyway, it did make me happy and laugh. I do like surprises and John sure is full of them. He's a good guy. Maybe it was just his little way of motivating me to read books sooner.

Incidentally, one of the last pieces of paper said, "I'm glad that you eventually read all the books I buy you." Ha Ha. Very funny. He is funny. But maybe a little too subtle for me sometimes.